Monday, October 27, 2008

30 Days

One month
That is all it is
Then no more of this distance
To be near each other is both wonderful and nervous filled
It will be okay

Decisions have been made
Exciting ones done together
and in 30 days I will leave the tin can my prison
and then we will hold and touch and communicate in person.

I cannot explain my joy it is exceptional.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Poor/Good Decisions

I am torn
my decision to be here was it good or bad
I know on one front that it was good
It will help to the future contribution of my choices
My move my love
On the other hand it feels like the worst choice in history
Tearing me literally from the arms of love
Causing stress
Not being present for important things
and distance just being difficult

I hope it adds to us in the forever not detract from us.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Phones and email

So as much as I love these things
Because they allow me to communicate
When the technology does not work it drives me nuts
I am tired of the distance, sick of the job and I just want to
Share when I want to

I don't think it is too selfish a request
Maybe this time all my choices will progress me enough
That I won't feel I stepped backwards

Saturday, October 4, 2008

My Tin Can and Little Things

I have a tin can which floats in the middle of the ocean
It holds thousands of people
But it is lonely
I have these little thoughts each day
Fleeting things like how I hold my fork and why
I want to discuss these trivial and stupid things
They are meaningless but knowing I can discuss with you
Is what makes you special
Is what makes us feel present, together, close

This thought teaches me how important moments are
The simple things shared that make a lifetime of memories
Remember the time when sat in a coffee shop and talked about single blade fans
Lifetime memories

My tin can is like a bubble
The sea around it is so vast I cannot comprehend land
My mind is on land
No my heart is on land
Thus I am missing a part of me
I want it back so I can share it
Right now you just get to hold it
Sharing is more fun

Besides when I have it it does not feel like I am missing a part of me
You know this feeling
That emptiness that says something feels not right
It is not wrong with us as one
But in the self a limb/organ is missing
It does not feel right

Soon I will leave my tin can
To reclaim my missing pieces
And put our puzzle together
I look forward to that day
For then we can also get off the roller coaster
and walk around the amusement park
Enjoying each others company.