Confusion

Some days are good.

Some are bad

Today a day where I think

Why did I even try?

Why did I not have the strength to say goodbye with the first sign?

Why and why and why?

Others say I am good?

I agree.

So really why did I do this to me?

The Hurt Locker

Jeremy Renner says

"when you are as old as me, you find you love only a few things

maybe it is just one thing"

And then they cut to him going back to the field, cut to him in his bomb suit.

He expresses he loves nothing but his work. Surface.

A look at the movie and his actions show that he is suicidal, looking to die

He is a looking for his suicide bomb

He loves his adrenaline, it is a drug, he loves his death because he needs escape

How can people get so cold that they lose the love they have the love that creates life in babies and leads to commitments like marriage?

How can we do what we do that pushes all that away?

Head Kick

I wrote to communicate about the debt owing

From you to me

Silence for a year of course nothing remains

But money

I have been civil and trusting that this will/can be

Resolved between us with out a court of law

Your email is no longer active, nor is your phone

So you have run

I believe that one day I will hear from you but I would like to know when

I have sent snail mail

We will see....