Contact

A year goes by

Limited contact

A few lame attempts to suggesting we work it out

No follow through

Silence

My pain, my misery,

Confusion, no explanation,

No understanding

Attempts to solve

Working solo for a year

I start to come to my senses

Accept you are gone

That your words are lies

I stand up

Write a goodbye email for me

and you respond

The only reason I write you say

Is to manipulate and get what I want

I wonder if you read anything in the past year

If you took time to look at us

Because all the emails say the same thing

"Please talk to me so we can figure this out"

Empty

The time has come where I have said

No more emails

No more contact (barring business)

I have sent my last one and stuck to it

There just comes a time when I accept the action

The words are empty

I know this

I can see this

It indicates that what we had may have been nothing

It is without question time to move on

Yet, inside my soul feels empty

I feel hollow

I feel missing

I feel some of me is truly gone

It dampens my spirit and

In some ways I feel I may never get it back

That I am not competent enough

To hold those feelings for anyone ever again

Each day I wake up

You still run in my mind

Each night I rest my head

You are in my thoughts

Time for you to go away too

Fully

Time to feel truly empty

How have...

you been treated lately?

A question in reference to you.

The answer, horribly, still no response.

I know it is done. Sad when all that was asked for was simple courtesy

Even if it was a goodbye.

I have been letting go but that gave me misty eyes.

I look at who presents themself to me lately

I just don't get excited, and I wonder if I ever will.

I really did give it all.

Better to have loved and.....

Frustration

All the things I am looking for are here

All is well

The things which cause me stress are not present

This is great

Why am I frustrated?

Because I want to share and experience it with someone

A special person

That is the part which seems to elude me constantly

They say we create our own worlds and destiny

I think I believe this

So why do I keep creating something in which I am frustrated

Lacking in one aspect or another?

That is the part which makes no sense

Why create that which we find disturbing?

It perplexes me and not sure how to remedy it!

Lately

I have been effected by excessive longing

Missing you

Wondering why

Wishing you would get out of my head

So I could just move forward and get something so much better

Cause you sure are not it with the silence and lack of communication you hold