I need to write the book.
If both parties cannot hold onto what they want and weather through the storms then discussion before throwing yourself headlong into something is pointless. Which leads to the often critizied as pessimistic theory that "You only win at love once"
Given the ideal of perfect love is happily ever after (interpreted however you want)
Happily ever after ends when someone dies
Thus when you are on your death bed if the person you had that conversation with (steps 1-3) is their then you know you won.
Ergo anywhere along the line that person leaves you did not win because they are not there till happily ever after.
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