I recall

All the things that I have done in the last while.
I go through all the changes that I have made.
I take stock of all I wanted to do and have done.
I see how it applies to you and wonder if I have grown.
Did I do it different, did I actually change?
Or have I reached the point where you tell me I am just the same?
In your own way of course
Ironically the signs that let me know that have always been the same
Not once have they been different.
At the end of the actions is the same conversation.
At least I have learned not to wait for it.
I call it out and work to change it
I fight to see if one wants to be fought for
In the end it has been the same
I at least leave with a sense of pride for having tried
For having lived up to all my words and actions by attempting to solve
I hope that I gain understanding that you explain and tell me what it is though
That is another commonality
No explanaiton
In the end do you really need one?
The point is it is the end.
In the future what I did in the past has no real bearing
For in the future my actions need to be assessed by another
That other must judge me as you have from their point of view
And let me know their judgement
Maybe theirs will be different
In the end
I will never know for I will not allow another to have that position in my life again
You are the last to be given that chance.