Weight

It is the stuff that people worry about
Am I too heavy to thin
I worry about it too
It is my health

But in reality that has nothing to do with my thought
I am thinking about and feeling the weight of emotion
The heaviness of the emotion on my shoulders
The strength it takes to carry it
I do so with joy for it is a good feeling
Tonight though and occassionally, you need to feel the opposite
You need to understand both sides
So tonight it feels a struggle

Not because I do not want this
But because I care so much
But because there is so much at stake
But because I am afraid to lose it
But because I am nervous to drop it
But because I am anxious of damaging it

Never before have I cared so much
That I carry the emotion like a young child
Carrying a precious piece of china mother said not to drop
There is so much value in that china, in the emotion I carry
To drop it carelessly to drop it accidently ...
It can never be replaced

I have the nerves that I will not be enough as time goes by
I have the nerves that I am not enough right now in my absence
I have the nerves that the fantasy will slip away
and it will be no different than the rest

But I have the courage to carry it
I have the strength to hold it up high
I have the stamina to cross any distance with it
For the value in this is value beyond any tangible thing
Beyond any intangible thing
And I will not set it down for all my nerves
Because she is worth every once that it weighs