The end? or the beginning?

It has been a long four weeks.
The girl of my dreams dropped a time bomb on me
That issues from the past that were dealt with were not
And as a result our relationship is not

We want to talk
We agree we need to be friends and regain trust
We have no idea where that takes us or what we want from that starting over
Starting over, her words but no knowledge of what we are starting

In the last four weeks none of the above agreements have been met
Each day I call, each day I email, each day I put effort into communicating
Each day she puts me off and I only have so much to give
If actions do not change it is obvious that words mean nothing
Without action and work to heal none takes place
There is hurt and anger on both sides but even that needs communication
Yelling at one another is a good way to start, provided you want to finish in a good place
It provides understanding to the pain and gets it out of the system
Keeping things holed up only allows them to fester

I know what I want but my hope has been crushed
I can only hold out for so long
Right now I take a deep breath
I just live and breathe everyday

I hope each day that the fantasy we started
truly becomes our reality
I am romantic at heart and want what so few have
true love
For a brief time I had it with her
I guess it is not true if she is not with me in the end

And so there it is
If we do not start talking soon
If we do not start communicating and building soon
We will never
I send out a universal prayer
That she still feels
That she wants to truly talk
That she hopes to find our friendship
That it rekindles our love
That she calls tonight and begins working with me on us

Let the universe here that my hope is for a happy next blog
For I have been broken, crushed and my heart stomped on
I gave all for I love
I thought if you gave truly it came back to you
So far I have been wrong
I want to be proven right for a change
I love therefore I hope